i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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