Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We have so much sex to catch up on
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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