no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
