Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
