You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
My vagina is officially offended.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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