normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize