So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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