I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
