My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
