oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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