$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
