i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
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I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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