I wish life had little blips of pornography
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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