It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
