Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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