Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
