A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
