You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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