id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
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