did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
