So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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