We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
