Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
two words: eviction party
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
