Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I am one with the molecules
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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