his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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