Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
