We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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