scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
