Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
