He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
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I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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