what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
