i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize