She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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