I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Randomize
