doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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