at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
