her vagine was all disorganized.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize
