I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
