Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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