ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
