garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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