Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
