Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
