Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Is Oprah even human
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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