great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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