Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
My breasts were aching with rage.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
