Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
The uberlube is also flammable
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
