accomplished twins. life is a go
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
