only if we run a train.
done.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
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