Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
