Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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