is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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